How do I make friends?
You likely never had to ask that question as a child. It just simply happened. However, now that you’re all grown up, it doesn’t seem to happen so naturally. Making friends can be difficult.
As church leadership has begun to roll out to Eastwood our unique mission, making friends is at the very crux of it. Eastwood and her people exist to develop relationships to impact people with biblical answers to life’s challenges. Therefore, if we are going to fulfill our unique mission, we must engage regularly in friend-making.
To help you in that effort, here are 7 tips for making friends.
1. Pray. Yes, you should pray that God would give you friends. You should pray about everything.
2. Be proactive. You may make friends just sitting by and hoping someone befriends you, but passivity will likely bear little fruit. You can’t catch a fish if you don’t cast a line. It is often the same way with friends. You must be proactive. If you want to make friends, you must try to make friends.
3. Choose environments that bring people together. Do you remember the show Friends? Where was the show primarily set? In a coffee shop called “Central Perk.” You see, there are certain environments that more easily bring people together—school, work, a club, a gym, a restaurant, a coffee house. Identify these places, and go hang out.
4. Chase passions more than people. Be careful chasing people. Nobody wants to be accused of being a stalker! It’s better instead to chase passions. People gravitate toward people who have common interests, people who love to do what they love to do. So, do what you love to do, and look around to see who else is doing it. Those people are good prospects for friends.
5. Be genuinely interested in other people. Self-interested people repel friends. If we want to make friends, we need to be others-focused. We need to show interest in who people are, what their background is, what makes them happy, and so on. Let them talk about themselves, and ask follow up questions. It shows that we care about them, and you should. You shouldn’t fake this. It should be genuine. Ask the Lord to help you care for them, and then be a good listener.
6. Show people kindness. Kindness opens the door for friendship. It doesn’t have to be big. Small of acts of kindness bring about big results. Give them a small gift. Invite them to lunch. Give them a compliment. Aesop said, “No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.”
7. Be an encourager. Positive people attract people. Nobody likes to be around a downer. So, learn to lift people up. You’ll likely be lifting up friends.
Now get out there develop friendships to impact people with biblical answers to life’s challenges!